I used to plan my life down to the nanosecond. Back in the US, both when I was working full-time and when I was semi-retired, my five-pound datebook was filled with appointments. When I got up every morning, I had my day’s activities laid out in front of me. All I had to do was show up to participate in them.

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There’s a certain amount of reserve when you plan your life down to every detail. Something is held back, and I call that something “joy.” I only know this now, in retrospect, because since moving to Costa Rica two years ago, I have changed from being a control-freak planner to letting opportunities show up in their own time. As a result, I have more fun, and I feel freer and less inhibited by all the must-do’s that used to run my life.

My datebook still has appointments written in ink, but there are far fewer obligations at an appointed time. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I teach English. On Monday afternoons I go to Spanish class, and on Wednesday nights I go to Latin dance class. I have a standing dinner date with two friends for Thursday nights, but the three of us are loose about it and can change to another night if we need to. There’s nothing else I have to do on schedule.

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That leaves a whole lot of free time to accept last-minute invitations, to extend some myself, and to enjoy my own company. I don’t mean that last comment in an inflated-ego sort of way.

There are things I like to do alone – read, watch TV and an occasional video, write, do Sudoku and jigsaw puzzles, manage my investments, enjoy my beautiful tropical yard, walk in the neighborhood, read and write emails to friends and family – that I always felt guilty taking the time to do before I moved to Costa Rica.

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Before this pleasant life, I was always on the go. I had to do, do, do. I still get into those modes, but now I also let myself relax, especially on the weekends.

I love being more spontaneous. I check in with myself and make a conscious choice about what I want to do, instead of getting on the automated conveyor belt to show up where I’m supposed to be. My life is richer from being more spontaneous, and I do things that I wouldn’t have had time to do before.

For example, on Friday morning a friend called to get together a group of friends to go to The Pub that night for fish and chips. Of course, I accepted the invitation. Our party of five had a blast and enjoyed good food, too. Another example: an acquaintance called to offer me some organic chocolate made in Costa Rica that contains over 80% cacao. I grabbed at the opportunity to taste locally-made dark chocolate at a very reasonable price, and I went over there. While I was in his neck of the woods, I stopped in to see two different friends.

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Plans have a way of changing here, and the least aggravating way to handle change is to go with the flow. Accept change, because it is inevitable. When I first got here, I would become upset when someone cancelled plans at the last minute. I have since accepted the fact that plans change all the time. Emergencies arise, traffic jams occur, visitors plan trips here at times that are inconvenient to us, you stop and talk to people on the way to an appointment, people are too tired from partying the night before…there is no end to the reasons for plans to change.

Last weekend I was supposed to meet a friend in the center of Ciudad Colon and together we would go to a party. After sitting in traffic that did not move for 45 minutes, I turned around and went home. I hadn’t realized that there was a tope (horse parade) going on and cars could not get in or out of the town.

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My friend, who does not have a cell phone, called me two hours later from her home. She had spent two hours on a bus on the same street I was stuck on when she decided to get off that bus, cross the street, and take a bus back to the place she started. We never did get to the party. It was a momentary loss, but there are so many parties to attend, that missing one was just a shrug.

I was not a particularly flexible person before I moved here. But I am now. If you’re thinking of moving to Costa Rica, be prepared to cut yourself and others some slack. This is the land of pura vida. A simple and happy lifestyle can be yours if you let it.

Written by VIP Member Margie Davis.

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